Parenting With The 12 Laws Of Karma

Use these 12 rules to guide you to better parenting and reap the rewards of good Karma for you and your family.

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Photo by MI PHAM on Unsplash

So let’s do a thought experiment. Let’s try to see if we can create some good vibes by applying the laws of Karma to our parenting.

Here are the 12 laws of Karma for parents:

This law says you must embody the qualities you wish your life to have.

What this means to parents is that if you want happy, well-adjusted children, you must start by being happy and well adjusted yourself.

If you want them to be calm, you must be calm. If you want your children to respect authority, you must be an example of authority. If you want them to master their impulses, you must master your own. Children learn by watching, they are programmed to analyze and internalize everything they see us do.

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Photo by Xavier Mouton Photographie on Unsplash

This says we need to be active participants in our own lives.

In parenting, it means we need to be actively parenting. We can’t wait around for someone else to teach our children what they need to know.

This law tells us to look outside of ourselves to tell us what is going on inside, meaning that if you don’t like the way your child behaves, look at yourself for the cause and, ultimately, the solution and then actively work to fix it.

This karmic rule says that you need to accept the reality of something before you can change it.

In parenting, this means that if your child has an issue, don’t go into denial about it. It’s easy to blame school or society to try to deflect. It makes you feel better to blame and deny. But let’s face it, you’re the one who’s shaped your child’s life so you must accept responsibility for any problem they have.

If any criticism of your child causes you to be defensive, that is a bad sign. Honest introspection is an excellent antidote to denial.

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Photo by Ryoji Iwata on Unsplash

The message here is that you need to create change in yourself before you can expect changes in the world around you.

If your child is out of control, you need to reinforce rules and consequences. If they are anxious, you need stronger routines.

The only control you have is over yourself, so if you want your child to change, change yourself first.

This is in the same wheelhouse as the Law of Growth but spells it out a little more bluntly.

If they overeat junk food, it’s because you buy it and feed it to them. It doesn’t matter if they scream when they don’t get it, that’s also not their fault. It’s how they’ve learned to communicate. They are reflecting what you have created back to you.

This law highlights the interconnected nature of the past, present, and future. It reminds us that our control over the present can help us to overcome patterns of the past for a better future.

Just because your parents were cold or abusive, it doesn’t mean you have to be.

The Law of Focus. The idea is that we can’t focus on two things at once. In Buddhism, it means that if we focus on our higher (spiritual) qualities, we won’t be able to focus on the lower ones (greed, materialism).

This law keeps us grounded in our higher selves so we can overcome our baser instincts. In parenting, this means to parent from your values rather than from your emotions.

When you don’t want to discipline, get strength from the knowledge that when you reinforce consequences, it makes your children better people in the long run. Don’t let the emotional impact of them crying in a time out lessen your resolve to teach a lesson.

The focus here is on the link between belief and practice. It is the importance of guaranteeing that your actions reflect your ideals.

This law is also about how the universe will test you.

If you are not living with integrity, they will notice. Say what you mean and mean what you say to give them consistency so they can develop a sense of safety that stems from a reality that makes sense.

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Photo by Patricia Prudente on Unsplash

This law reminds you that the present is all you really have, so try to be fully engaged.

It reminds us that even though parenting is difficult, especially the early years, try to stay present as much as possible and enjoy your child.

Enjoy them for who they are, not who you want them to be. Don’t put unrealistic expectations on them or make them live your dreams. Be with them now, at this moment, loving them for who they are.

This is the idea that the universe gives us what we need and that history continually repeats itself until we learn the lessons to create a different future.

Generations of families can get stuck in toxic loops of behaviors and emotional problems if nobody heals themselves before they have children. If your family exhibits toxic patterns that you know are dysfunctional, it is best to address these before you have children, so you don’t repeat them.

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Photo by Marisa Howenstine on Unsplash

This states that success requires work and means that you need to be persistent, to achieve your goals in life. You can’t expect instant results.

If you want them to sleep in their bed, you must commit to following through until they get used to the idea even if they cry about it in the beginning. Giving in to a child creates an environment where lessons can’t be taught or learned. Follow through needs time to make things work. If they aren’t adjusting to something, you need to persist long enough for them to adjust.

Some children take six days to adapt to a new behavior (sleep training or potty training, for example). Some take six weeks or months. If you give up easily on things, chances it’s your behavior that is sabotaging them, not theirs.

This law emphasizes that every contribution you make will influence the Whole. When you contribute good to the world, you inspire others to do the same and attract more good vibes back into your life.

Use these 12 rules to guide you to better parenting and reap the rewards of good Karma for you and your family.

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Writer, musician, toddler wrangler. Author: “How To Be Wise AF”, a 30-day prompted journal-find out more on Amazon. Contact me at

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